Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Words Women Use



This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.



(2) Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.



(3) Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.


(4) Go Ahead (Raised Eyebrows)

This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!



(5) Loud Sigh

This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)



(6) That's Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.



(7) Thanks

A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' ... that will bring on a 'whatever').



(8) Whatever

Is a women's way of saying SCREW YOU!



(9) Don't worry about it, I got it

Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.



(10) I DON'T CARE

That's the phrase that comes right before she says "WHAT DO YOU THINK" and "IT DOESN"T MATTER" but, like you said, she really DOES care, and it DOES matter, but you need to figure it out, usually with an extended series of suggestions or questions. For example:



Man: "What do you want to eat tonight"

Woman: "I DON"T CARE"..."WHAT DO YOU THINK"Man: "How about pizza?"

Woman: "No, I don't feel like pizza"

Man: "How about chinese?"

Woman: "No, I don't want chinese"

Man: "How about ..."

Woman: "No, I don't want ..."

AND THE QUESTIONS CONTINUE UNTIL SHE SAYS"IT DOESN"T MATTER...why don't we get pizza"



(11) Go ahead(normal eyebrows)
This is not permission either. It means, "I give up!" or "Do what you want because I don't care." It is followed in a few minutes by a raised eyebrow "Go Ahead," followed by "Nothing" and "Fine." She will talk to you for about "Five Minutes" once she cools off.



(12) Please do

This is not a statement, it's an offer. She's giving you a chance to come up with some excuse for the latest dumb thing you've done, i.e., a chance to get yourself into even more trouble. Handle this correctly and you won't get a "That's okay."


(13) Oh
This word, followed by any statement, is trouble. "Oh, let me get that." Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days.





Send this to the men you know, to warn them about future arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology!!! • And send it to your women friends to give them a good laugh!!!

33 comments:

  1. It's a little early don't you think. But a good TT even early. Happy TT. I don't even know if I'm doing one this week.

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  2. My husband says most of those things.

    My TT is up.

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  3. Funny. I have always known that men and women speak different languages--as evinced anytime I try to explain to a service man what the problem is. I often wonder if they see "stupid" written somewhere on my face, because they sure don't get it!
    TM

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  4. LOLOL!! My kids would so agree with you on most of these, especially the eyebrows lol It drives them insane. Thanks for the chuckles. Happy T13!

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  5. 3 and 8....my favorites!!

    Hope to see you visit with me soon if you can stop by.

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  6. Happy TT. ROFL on your list. It cracked me up b/c those words have come out of my mouth. And you hit the meanings spot on.

    My TT is on 13 romantic suspense authors I love in honor of my first novel coming out at the end of the month. Stop by if you have time.

    http://www.gabriellahewitt.com/blog/index.php

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  7. Wow... a little snark going on in your house?? ;)

    I say "thanks" a lot. In fact, people always comment on how polite my hubby and I are to each other. (shrugging) it works! :)

    ((hug)) in case you need it!

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  8. ROFL thanks I needed a laugh :P

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  9. Hey. I'm early, too. I really looked forward to TT this week. I'll be emailing this to my husband. Too bad that men and women don't speak the same language.

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  10. All I can say is, who's been watching?

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  11. I was on Hootin' Anni's blog and saw where you mentioned that you reside in MI (so do I).

    This T13 is pretty funny. I will admit that I gave up trying to decipher "womanspeak" a few years ago.

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  12. Funny...my son has started spouting "5 minutes" back at me lately.

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  13. I think all men should get a copy of this. Im printing one up right now:) Happy TT.

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  14. that's awesome! I love it! Heehee! My husband also nodded in agreement at each one I read to him.

    Thanks for the visit!

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  15. My husband has probably read this BUT he still doesn't get it! I tend to use #8 a lot. Oh well. I don't care! Fine! Whatever.

    Great TT!

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  16. The only one on the list I use is "fine" which I learned from my husband. My mother still shakes her head at it.

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  17. Wow, if I can get my husband to read these, we may never argue again! Awesome!

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  18. I've seen this way too many times - but each time, I laugh way too hard! Thanks for another bout of laughing!

    Happy TT!

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  19. And?
    So?

    You are so right!

    SJR
    The Pink Flamingo
    http://thepinkflamingo.blogharbor.com/blog

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  20. I say a couple of those things.

    Okay, a few. Several? Most!?!?!

    Dadgummit, fine already!

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  21. LOL!! That is the best T13 list ever! I'm bookmarking your blog so I can come back read some more at a later date.

    Here's mine . . .

    http://3garnetsn2sapphires.blogspot.com/2008/07/thursday-thirteen-4th-edition.html

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  22. Great Thursday Thirteen! and funny!!!

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  23. This is a hilarious list! I really enjoyed it - and it's so true. :)

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  24. Michelle,
    Thanks for the birthday wishes for my daughter. You asked if I had commented on your Thursday Thirteen. I have not. Today is the first time I've been here and the first I've heard about the TT. Sorry I'm not the person you are looking for.

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  25. LOL...so true..so very true :-P
    Great TT :-)

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  26. Love love love this list! What a great TT! Thanks!
    Come visit Wani's World to check out my TT this week!

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  27. Hehe. I've seen these before and they always make me laugh :)

    Thanks for sharing!

    Happy TT!

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  28. Your TT sums up everything. I can only comment EXACTLY! I will be sending this to my husband. Hopefully he will learn.

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  29. And if she's also a mom (or a grandmom)she'll say "mm-hmmm, we'll see...."
    This usually means no, but you won't know for sure for a while.

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  30. These are great! True and funny.

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